An anniversary of sorts

These next 4 months are an anniversary of sorts. Four years ago was the four months Jax spent fighting for his life in the PICU. If you've heard the story or are sick of it I'm sorry.
Do I dwell on it?
No..
But I do think its important to remember what happened and what he went through. I take pictures of him every time he is in the hospital. And I take them no matter how bad he looks because I do think its important to have those. I don't remember every single day. Its times like this that I really wish I had a blog back then. It would be really nice to be able to look back and be like, Oh he was extubated this day, or he had an art line put in that day. There are specific days I remember like the brain injury, or all of his heart surgeries. But I can't remember every time they had to reintubate him, or scans, MRI's, and lines.
Every month I'm just going to talk a little about it, since most of you know the story. He was admitted April 22, and continuously got worse until April 27th was the first time he was rushed to PICU in respiratory failure and had to be intubated. So May was hard because he was intubated for a week, they extubated him late one night right before shift change and we left so I didn't get to hold him. And when I came in the next day he was on C-pap and they were going to intubate him again. I demanded to hold him on the C-pap before they reintubated him, and thats the first and last time in May I held him!

The top is the beginning of May and the bottom is the end of May.

Four years, wow, that means my baby is going to be 5 this year! Wow how times flies, and yet seems to stand still at the same time. Its amazing to both see how far Jax has come, and how stunted some things still seem to be.
Like I never thought four years later we'd still have so many tubes climbing into his crib, or that he would even still be in a crib!

I love how his piggies haven't grown in 4 years. He still wears a size1 shoe! And my favorite thing in the morning is when he wakes up and stretches and his piggies pop out above the crib sides!

And his little personality! The boy will never look at the camera! Or how his little fingers are always around his face. Its a rarity to get a picture of his little lips!